D&D One-Room Scenarios: A Drow Enjoys a Birthday Relapse Aboard a Pretty Skyship

Dec 30

Breakup Gaming Society’s Chief Mixologist, Skrrt_Vonnegut, offers up a character for sacrifice to Darkroast McFanticide, a hulking, rusty, armored murderer who makes sure D&D 5e sessions are short and bloody. Skrrt did a good job. Plus he got to prepare, unlike the first time when I ran Darkroast against an unsuspecting Hurricane 75.

I thought I could squeeze in some identity theft opportunities when we were sketching out the backstory for Skrrt’s PC, who was boring.

We clear up some confusion about his character’s name and then we’re almost ready for the scenario.

The scenario revolves around Pumpkin Hazelnut-Lose getting to take a morning pleasure cruise on an airship for his birthday. Skrrt’s into it.

We establish that the ship is pretty, the sun is a strange color, and that Pumpkin has a dumb cone hat and some Demerol. An excited party of sight-seers queues for the ramp and talk excitedly. Skrrt determines that they’re talking about the on-field exploits of the Gauntlegrim GrundleReavers, who are “second in college rockball.”

Skrrt announces that Pumpkin is getting into the Demerol early in the trip. Wine is being served in the prow viewing area, and a roll on the Party Table determines that Pumpkin Hazelnut-Lose knocks down seven glasses, to which Skrrt also adds shrooms.

Some pleasant conversation with other passengers somehow occurs and I walk into a zinger.

Skrrt switches up some location details, so we work that into the story in as things tilt toward ugliness.

Skrrt’s character gets cut off by an exasperated wine steward, who tries to mollify him with a 1/3 pour. Then we get our first indications that Darkroast McFanticide has stowed away on the ship. Soon Pumpkin will be dead and we can both go do something else.

Pumpkin Hazelnut-Lose has a hat full of vomit and Darkroast has begun his trail of carnage on the now-listing ship, murdering his way toward the prow and breaking things. Everybody on the ship gets booted over the side or is clotheslined to death. Pumpkin and one other character are the only ones who can summon their wits and face Darkroast McFanticide down.

Pumpkin’s ad hoc comrade-in-arms gets his face slapped off after the two assault Darkroast McFanticide. Pumpkin’s attack highly amuses the villain, who cracks his skull.